Earlier, Netflix posted about their addition of the children’s cartoon, “My Little Pony: Friendship Is Magic” and the response was overwhelmingly butt-hurt.  Here are a few of the comments I read on the post:

“Sorry, no interest for myself or my daughter in watching sexualized ponies.”

“just when i thought netflix couldn’t get any gayer…”

“Dear Netflix, just shut up and add movies. Thank you. Love Me.”

“even as a little girl i HATED my little pony! i melted them with lighters and blew them up in my microwaves!!!!! i think i even strapped one to a bottlerocket once…..”

The solution to all of these problems is a simple one, though it might sound extremely difficult to the uninitiated.  If you don’t like what Netflix chooses to add to their service, DON’T FUCKING WATCH IT.  Plain and simple.  See it in your Netflix line-ups, scroll past it like every other show and movie you ignore, and continue on with your life.  I used to be like you and complain when Netflix threw something stupid on there, then I remembered that as sole owner of my account I have no obligation to watch what they offer. 

But, here’s where it gets really dumb.  These same people that keep complaining and threatening to cancel their accounts over something being added, are the same folks that never actually go through and cancel their accounts.  It’s like every moron on here (myself included) that threatens to permanently close their Facebook accounts, but never do.  It’s all an attention grab, in hopes of getting something changed… as if some comment left by some douche on the internet is gonna sway the suits at Netflix to make choices tailor-fit to your style. 

One other thing I don’t get, is all the hate toward “bronies.”  Brony is (IMO) a derogatory term tossed at older MLP fans that do nothing else wrong besides watching a cartoon.  The same people that call these bronies “pedophiles” or “creeps” for liking the show are most likely the same buffoons that cry for Nicktoons to come back on the air.  If people should be likened to perverts because they like a cartoon, then you’re all a bunch of perverts too.  There is no bigger form of arrogance than labeling someone just because of their interests, rather than accepting the person for their own being. 

Another thing no one ever stops to think about is, Netflix isn’t some Torrent service.  It’s not a file-sharing network where EVERYTHING should be available.  Netflix is a subscription service that allows you to stream programs from the thousands of movies and shows available.  As such, no one’s required to stay on board.  Just like with premium movie channels, if you realize you’re paying more for something than you’re getting back from it, you should more than likely cancel the shit. 

Furthermore, Netflix only has so many movies and shows because those are the programs they actually have the broadcasting rights for.  If you wanna bitch about a company not offering the shit you wanna watch, there are three things you can do:

1.)  Look up whoever holds the copyrights for the show/movie you wanna see and contact them.  Let them know that you want their program to stream on Netflix.  If companies get enough pressure and demand, they eventually cave.  It’s like every time a cable company like Time Warner has to drop a channel because of contract negotiations.  While the provider is indeed responsible for making sure content stays put, it’s ultimately up to the other party to settle on something. 

2.)  Not good enough, or too hard?  Cancel Netflix and do your business elsewhere.  Join Hulu.  Get a Crackle account.  Amazon Instant Video is great (especially if you actually pay up the $79 a year for Prime).  Hell, if you’ve got the money, stop relying on digital services to bring you your content and go fucking buy it.  Nowadays, there are DVDs for just about everything, and whatever’s missing can be found on VHS most likely.  If you give that much of a shit, get the actual movies or shows on your own media. 

3.)  If all else fails, keep bitching.  Even though it’ll do you no good, it’ll keep people like me away from childish people like you. 

That’s all for now.  If you watch MLP, enjoy it now that it’s on Netflix.  If you don’t, then shut the hell up and keep going.  Bronies don’t hurt you.  MLP doesn’t hurt you.  Get over yourselves.

Last night was a terrific night for movies and for entertainment in general.  The 84th Annual Academy Awards saw the return of Billy Crystal as host.  Whether it was during his musical number about the Best Picture nominees, Robert Downey Jr.’s camera play during the Best Documentary portion of the show, or the gorgeous Emma Stone’s hilarious hamming during a presentation with Ben Stiller, this was one of the funniest Oscar ceremonies in recent memory.

Of course, however, there were also a few slip-ups during the proceedings.  After the crew from Undefeated won their trophy for Best Documentary Feature, not only did they make way for the sole utilization of the fifteen-second delay, but they also dragged the acceptance speech on for such a while that the “wrap it up” music had to be played and their mics quieted.  That was more humorous than anything.  Other than that, there seemed to be a technical problem involving the microphones where almost a robotic or auto-tuned sound emanated from the voices of every presenter after about the third-way point.

But aside from the glitz and glamour, how well-deserved and varied were the awards this season?  Well, let’s take a good look first at the Best Picture nominees again, along with their total nominations:

The Artist, 10 Nominations
The Descendants, 5 Nominations
Extremely Loud and Incredibly Close, 2 Nominations
The Help, 4 Nominations
Hugo, 11 Nominations
Midnight In Paris, 4 Nominations
Moneyball, 6 Nominations
The Tree of Life, 3 Nominations
Warhorse, 6 Nominations

In a brief nutshell, yesterday I predicted that either The Artist, Hugo, Moneyball or The Help would ultimately walk away with Best Picture.  However, this is ultimately how the awards were split between the nominees:

The Artist, 5 Wins
Hugo, 5 Wins
The Help, 1 Win
Moneyball, nothing.

Before I go on any further, I was slightly disappointed that Moneyball walked away empty-handed.  From what I recall, Moneyball was an excellent film that made even the uninitiated in baseball feel completely mesmerized and involved.  Christopher Plummer is an excellent actor, but I thought for sure Jonah Hill just might have had his night.  He deserved it.

Anyhow, aside from that last night’s awards distribution turned out just about the way I expected it to.  I figured The Help would win at least one statue where it counts; in this case, the beautiful performance from Octavia Spencer.  Having only watched her performance once I was still equally as mesmerized when viewing that brief performance clip from last night’s show.  I was very happy with her win, even if it meant Bérénice Bejo missed out on the award for her provocative performance as aspiring star Peppy Miller in The Artist.

Speaking of The Artist, are any of my followers convinced now how amazing of a movie that actually is?!  I did just about everything besides tearing up when I saw it take Costume Design, then Original Score, then director Michel Hazanavicius, then leading man Jean Dujardin, then BEST PICTURE BABY!  I sensed an eerie semblance to last year’s presentation when The King’s Speech swept the latter portion of the awards show.  Both very deserving and very energetic films, even if both have different styles entirely.

That’s not to say that Hugo didn’t deserve it either.  Martin Scorsese’s Hugo is one of the most whimsical adventures I’ve seen in a long time, but I believe that The Artist had an edge and style to it that not even the Best Art, Visual Effects, Cinematography or sound work could compare to.  Artist was a visually demanding tour-de-force, that didn’t rely on visual effects or loud noises to convey its message of transition and moving on.  Speaking of visual effects, I am also slightly let down that Rise of the Planet of the Apes didn’t win its sole nomination.

So in conclusion, everyone should watch both Hugo and The Artist to see these great works of art for themselves.  If you can help it, watch The Artist with somebody.

COMPLETE LIST OF WINNERS

The Artist:  BEST PICTURE, Best Director (Michel Hazanavicius), Best Actor in a Leading Role (Jean Dujardin), Best Costume Design and Best Original Score
Hugo:  Best Visual Effects, Best Sound Mixing, Best Sound Editing, Best Art Direction and Best Cinematography
The Iron Lady:  Best Actress (Meryl Streep) and Best Makeup
Midnight In Paris:  Best Original Screenplay
The Descendants:  Best Adapted Screenplay
The Help:  Best Supporting Actress (Octavia Spencer)
A Separation:  Best Foreign Film
The Girl With The Dragon Tattoo:  Best Editing
Undefeated:  Best Documentary
Rango:  Best Animated Feature Film
Beginners:  Best Supporting Actor (Christopher Plummer)
The Muppets:  Best Original Song, “Man or Muppet”

Stay tuned around the same time next year for the 85th!  Cheers to a good year in film.

I jumped out of my seat screaming in joy when Tom Cruise said “The Artist”!  Congratulations to the wonderful cast and crew, and thank you for your wonderful contribution to not only an international culture, but my own imagination.  Thank you!

Well, it looks like awards season is about ready to come to a close.  We’ve made to the big night.  Oscar night.  Nine films garnered Best Picture nominations this year:  The Artist, The Descendants, Extremely Loud and Incredibly Close, The Help, Hugo, Midnight in Paris, Moneyball, The Tree of Life, and WarHorse.

All the films nominated (well, maybe besides Extremely Loud) are very well-deserving of their nominations.  How do they all break down though?  Hugo has 11 nominations, The Artist has 10, Moneyball and WarHorse both received 6, The Descendants received five, The Help received four, The Tree of Life got three, and Extremely Loud only received two.

Last year, through a process of elimination I was able to successfully predict The King’s Speech as that year’s Best Picture.  So this year, following the same process I can safely predict that either The Artist, Hugo, or Moneyball will walk away with the Best Picture statue.  While we’re at it, I’ll break down exactly how I came up with those three…

Once again, bear in mind that this is only an analysis, and should not be taken as what the eventual outcome will be.

Due to pale reviews, Extremely Loud and Incredibly Close is out. Since there’s no name recognition besides Brad Pitt—who received a Best Actor nomination from Moneyball—it’s likely that voters will completely erase The Tree of Life from their memories.

Midnight in Paris may face trouble for the plain and simple fact that it’s been out most of the year and reviewers may have since been attracted to more appetizing films. Then again, we cannot forget about Crash (if you recall, Crash came out of nowhere to win Best Picture over hopeful Brokeback Mountain at the 78th Annual awards).  On a similar note, I choose The Help as a “dark horse” contender because of (1) its popularity, and (2) it’s been out for viewers since August.

Very ironically, I think WarHorse doesn’t stand a chance. Critics may love the film, but the mainstream movie-goer is tired of horse epics (see Seabiscuit). That leaves The Descendants, which I feel simply will not win because of George Clooney’s The Ides of March, a political thriller that received lots more attention despite Descendant’s higher reviews.

So there’s my take: The Artist, Hugo and Moneyball have the best chances at the big prize tonight. The Help also has a strong chance, but it’s not as likely as the other three.

The 84th Annual Academy Awards will broadcast live tonight at 8PM Eastern, 5PM Pacific time.

He’ll never give it up.

Starring:  Jean Dujardin, Bérénice Bejo, John Goodman
Length:  100 Minutes
Director:  Michel Hazanavicius
Rating:  PG-13, for a disturning image and a crude gesture.
Genre:  Drama / Romance / Comedy

I’m gonna preface my review the way I would usually end them; by talking about how simply shocked and surprised I was by The Artist.  I absolutely loved everything about it.  I laughed, I smiled, I was in awe, I was in suspense, I was simply… into the movie.  It’s why I get so let down around Oscar season—it’s amazing films such as this one I was missing all year long.

I liked how after a while, I forgot I was watching a movie that was released recently. All of the actors, especially leading man Jean Dujardin, had an irresistible nostalgic charm in their movements, and their actions.  That sort of charisma is important for The Artist, because well… it’s a black-and-white mostly-silent film, so it demands actors capable enough to handle what the director (and the audience) expect of them.

Anyway, the film begins in 1927 Hollywoodland, where George Valentin (Dujardin) is a runaway success as a silent film actor.  Well-admired, charismatic, yet filled with foolish pride, he vehemently denies that the industry will ever change into one where the characters SPEAK.  He has absolutely no confidence in the advent of “talkies,” and proceeds to keep acting.

Meanwhile, a young woman named Peppy Miller (Bejo) literally bumps into Valentin and the two seem to have an attraction for each other.  One day, she runs into him again and he gives her advice on standing out from other actresses.  This seems to work and she gets propelled into stardom, all thanks to George’s kindly advice.

However, one day his studio boss Mr. Zimmer (portrayed by John Goodman) lets George go when Zimmer decides to have his studio exclusively film talkies.  Wounded but not ready to abandon post, Valentin plans his comeback.  Along the way however, himself and Peppy become intertwined with each other’s lives and careers.

The execution of this plot actually looks and sounds way better on film.  I loved the director’s approach for the movie—being black-and-white it leaves a bittersweet feeling, and without sound the audience relies on the depth of the acting and the scope of the beautiful old-timey film score—and it works excellently.

BOTTOM LINE:  This film is absolutely a perfect one for 2011, and could already be one of the best movies I’ve ever seen before.

10 OUT OF 10

Seeing and reviewing Best Picture nominee THE ARTIST later.  Stick around.

Starring:  Tom Hanks, Thomas Horn, Sandra Bullock
Length:  129 Minutes
Director:  Stephen Daldry
Rating:  PG-13, for emotional thematic material, some disturbing images, and language.
Genre:  Drama

Before I dig into the review, let me give a bit of a spiel regarding my opinion of 9/11-based movies.  I personally see no fault or problem in films being made about the event, as long as it doesn’t in any way come off as exploitative (I’m pointing at YOU, World Trade Center).  Many I know say they usually pass on 9/11 films due to having already lived through it, but have you?  With that in mind, on with the review.

This past Tuesday, the Academy announced their nominations for this year’s Oscars.  Among them was Extremely Loud and Incredibly Close, which was greeted with applause as it was revealed it nabbed a Best Picture nomination.  So today, I’ve decided to see the film for myself, and I have to honestly say I was left feeling disappointed.

Thomas Schell (Tom Hanks), a loving husband and father, was killed on 9/11 during a meeting at the World Trade Center.  He leaves behind his distraught wife Linda (Bullock) and his always-curious son Oskar (Horn), born with a natural sense for adventure and seeing things through.  Weeks after “the worst day” as he calls it, Oskar is shuffling through his deceased father’s closet when he knocks over a vase containing a key, which is in a small envelope with “Black” written on it.

To make all sorts of explaining really short, he sets off on an expedition in New York City.  His plan is to find every person with the last name “Black” in all the five boroughs, hoping to get information about the mystery key.  Along the way he meets many people facing problems of their own, including a sheltered and mute-by-choice old man (Max Von Sydow, in the best performance of this movie) who only goes by the alias ‘The Renter.’

Along the way, Oskar slowly pries his way into the Renter’s mysterious life and equally strains his relationship with his mother, all in the hope of getting another chance at a few more minutes of spiritual face-time with his father.

I’m not gonna lie, I loved the story.  However, screenwriters Eric Roth and Jonathan Foer pulled a few cinematic punches I didn’t really like.  Parts of the way the story was told seem to deceive us, almost to the point of leaving an inconsistent pace.  This left me as an audience member feeling disjointed and asking myself if parts of the film were indeed the exploitation I was speaking of earlier.

I was left feeling like if this film’s background was anything BESIDES 9/11, this film would be absolutely forgettable and the Academy would pay no heed.  I’m not saying I feel like the film ONLY got Oscar attention because of that legitimate “worst day,” I’m just saying that let’s say Tom Hanks was killed in a car wreck or something, then the eventual moral of this film would be completely ruined before the quarter-mark.  It’s as though Stephen Daldry is assuming the core audience only knows 9/11 by an emergency number, and I didn’t like that.

BOTTOM LINE: From this day forward, I will refer to this film as Extremely Loud, Yet Incredibly Dull.

5 OUT OF 10

Review of Extremely Loud and Incredibly Close coming at 1PM.

Oscar season is upon us, which most likely means I’ll revise my top films of 2011. 

Tomorrow, this Tumblr page will be blacked out in unison with the several other websites protesting these awful pieces of legislation.  If you want in on the action too, check this page out for all the info you’ll need on how to set your Tumblr or other pages up for it.  https://github.com/SaraJo/SOPA-PIPA-Protest-Page

This is gonna be huge, friends.  I hope you’ll participate, or at least spread the word yourself.